The Shank Hex of Ryan Fitzgerald
Ryan Fitzgerald · CAR · K
“Fitzgerald gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Florida State's biggest rival.” — Madame Waiver Wire
More ways the witch ruins Fitzgerald's week
- Fitzgerald finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- Fitzgerald will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.
76%POTENCY
-9.9PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- A single Jets jersey, ironically worn
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- An unused timeout (still warm)
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Fitzgerald's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Ryan Fitzgerald in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ryan Fitzgerald is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ryan Fitzgerald actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.