The Shank Hex of Ryan Fitzgerald
Ryan Fitzgerald · CAR · K
“Fitzgerald is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.” — Madame Waiver Wire
More ways the witch ruins Fitzgerald's week
- Fitzgerald will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
- The crowd chants "WIDE LEFT" for Fitzgerald. Fitzgerald does not ignore it. Neither does the ball.
74%POTENCY
-10.2PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Jets locker room
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Fitzgerald drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Ryan Fitzgerald in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ryan Fitzgerald is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ryan Fitzgerald actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.