The Shank Hex of Ryan Fitzgerald
Ryan Fitzgerald · CAR · K
“The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. Fitzgerald is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Fitzgerald's week
- Fitzgerald is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
- Fitzgerald will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
81%POTENCY
-16.2PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- Powdered kicker confidence
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Fitzgerald drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Ryan Fitzgerald in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ryan Fitzgerald is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ryan Fitzgerald actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.