The Sunday Night Fade Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“LaPorta is targeted on a 3rd-and-17 and gains exactly 16 yards. Punt. Cry.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
- LaPorta gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Iowa's biggest rival.
88%POTENCY
-9.9PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Raiders locker room
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
LaPorta drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.