The Sunday Night Fade Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“LaPorta scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta runs a perfect route, gets wide open, and is ignored in a way that feels personal.
- LaPorta's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.
90%POTENCY
-14.6PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Colts locker room
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make LaPorta's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.