The Mystery Tweak Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“LaPorta has his best game ever, but it is for the opposing fantasy manager in another league.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- LaPorta goes down with a "tweak" in a game that was already won. Never even needed him.
85%POTENCY
-15.7PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make LaPorta's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.