The Hamstring Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“LaPorta catches 2 balls for 11 yards and a nice hug from a referee.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
- LaPorta lines up as a tackle on 61% of snaps. A beautiful new career for him.
91%POTENCY
-9.7PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make LaPorta's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.