The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“A mysterious flag erases LaPorta's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- LaPorta stays in to block all game. A bold use of a fantasy asset.
74%POTENCY
-18.5PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
Incantation
Eye of Bills, tongue of ref,
Bring Lions down to grief,
LaPorta scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.