The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“LaPorta gets "rested" in a week the team clinched nothing.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
- LaPorta gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Iowa's biggest rival.
84%POTENCY
-18.6PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
LaPorta's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.