The Invisible Route Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“LaPorta scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta is targeted on a 3rd-and-17 and gains exactly 16 yards. Punt. Cry.
- LaPorta sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
83%POTENCY
-11.6PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
LaPorta's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.