The Chip-and-Release Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“LaPorta runs a perfect route, gets wide open, and is ignored in a way that feels personal.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.
- LaPorta gets a "catch" that is overturned. Then another. The ref is now his nemesis.
87%POTENCY
-10.3PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Broncos locker room
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
LaPorta drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.