The Invisible Route Hex of Theo Johnson
Theo Johnson · NYG · TE
“A mysterious flag erases Johnson's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Johnson's week
- Johnson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Penn State's biggest rival.
- Johnson gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
92%POTENCY
-9.5PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Johnson drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Malik Nabers
- Colston Loveland
- Cam Skattebo
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Theo Johnson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Theo Johnson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Theo Johnson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.