The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Alex Kessman
Alex Kessman · CAR · K
“A localized thunderstorm forms over Kessman's stadium. Only over Kessman.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Kessman's week
- Kessman sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
- Kessman hits the upright twice, then the other upright, then somehow the crossbar from the side.
85%POTENCY
-9.5PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single tear from a Ravens fan
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Bears locker room
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Kessman's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Kessman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Kessman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Kessman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.