The Shank Hex of Alex Kessman
Alex Kessman · CAR · K
“Kessman kicks a perfect ball into the end zone... and it is a kickoff. For the other team.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Kessman's week
- Kessman will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- Kessman attempts a field goal, the holder pulls it back, and gets sacked at the 12. Points: 0. Dignity: also 0.
73%POTENCY
-18.4PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Kessman, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Kessman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Kessman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Kessman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.