The Wide Left Hex of Alex Kessman
Alex Kessman · CAR · K
“Coach goes for it on 4th-and-2 every time Kessman trots out. He watches from the bench like a retiree.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Kessman's week
- Kessman sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
- Kessman is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
82%POTENCY
-18.8PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Kessman's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Kessman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Kessman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Kessman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.