The Late Scratch Hex of Alex Kessman
Alex Kessman · CAR · K
“Kessman will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Kessman's week
- Kessman warms up well and then the snap is bad. The hold is worse. The kick is a prayer.
- Kessman will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.
74%POTENCY
-11.7PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A used challenge flag
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Kessman drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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FAQ
How do I curse Alex Kessman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Kessman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Kessman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.