The Phantom Flag Hex of Arizona Cardinals
Arizona Cardinals defense
“The Cardinals defense allows a 99-yard drive, a 71-yard punt return, and a trick play from the 1989 playbook.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Arizona Cardinals defense's week
- The Cardinals defense gets a pick-six called back for a penalty on... the defense. In the end zone.
- The Cardinals defense is "disguising coverages". The disguise is a clown nose. Fully see-through.
85%POTENCY
-17.6PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Cardinals, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Trey McBride
- Tyler Allgeier
- Carson Beck
- Chad Ryland
- Tavien Feaster
- Simi Fehoko
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
- Indianapolis Colts
- Seattle Seahawks
FAQ
How do I curse Arizona Cardinals defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Arizona Cardinals defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Arizona Cardinals defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.