The Chip-and-Release Hex of Brenden Bates
Brenden Bates · JAX · TE
“Bates lines up as a tackle on 61% of snaps. A beautiful new career for him.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Bates's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.
- Bates gets "rested" in a week the team clinched nothing.
80%POTENCY
-12.5PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Bates's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bhayshul Tuten
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Parker Washington
- Brian Thomas Jr.
FAQ
How do I curse Brenden Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Brenden Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Brenden Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.