The Late Scratch Hex of Bronson Kaufusi
Bronson Kaufusi · GB · TE
“Kaufusi gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of BYU's biggest rival.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Kaufusi's week
- Kaufusi finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- Kaufusi will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
88%POTENCY
-15.8PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- Powdered kicker confidence
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A used challenge flag
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Kaufusi's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Jacobs
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Christian Watson
- Tucker Kraft
- Jordan Love
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Bronson Kaufusi in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Bronson Kaufusi is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Bronson Kaufusi actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.