The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Cairo Santos
Cairo Santos · CHI · K
“At 35, Santos is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Santos's week
- Santos gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
- Santos finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
73%POTENCY
-16.3PTS DRAINED
Eye-Roll MaterialVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- A single tear from a Saints fan
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
Incantation
Eye of Browns, tongue of ref,
Bring Bears down to grief,
Santos scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Caleb Williams
- Colston Loveland
- Luther Burden III
- D'Andre Swift
- Kyle Monangai
- Rome Odunze
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
FAQ
How do I curse Cairo Santos in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Cairo Santos is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Cairo Santos actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.