The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Cairo Santos
Cairo Santos · CHI · K
“A mysterious flag erases Santos's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Santos's week
- The crowd chants "WIDE LEFT" for Santos. Santos does not ignore it. Neither does the ball.
- Santos will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
84%POTENCY
-12PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- Powdered kicker confidence
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Santos drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Caleb Williams
- Colston Loveland
- Luther Burden III
- D'Andre Swift
- Kyle Monangai
- Rome Odunze
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
FAQ
How do I curse Cairo Santos in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Cairo Santos is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Cairo Santos actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.