The Upright Hex of Cairo Santos
Cairo Santos · CHI · K
“At 35, Santos is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — The Hex-Pert
More ways the witch ruins Santos's week
- The crowd chants "WIDE LEFT" for Santos. Santos does not ignore it. Neither does the ball.
- Santos makes a 58-yarder... in pregame. Not counted.
82%POTENCY
-17.6PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Santos, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Caleb Williams
- Colston Loveland
- Luther Burden III
- D'Andre Swift
- Kyle Monangai
- Rome Odunze
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
FAQ
How do I curse Cairo Santos in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Cairo Santos is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Cairo Santos actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.