The Snap Count Hex of Cairo Santos
Cairo Santos · CHI · K
“Santos finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Santos's week
- Santos gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Tulane's biggest rival.
- Santos is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
87%POTENCY
-14PTS DRAINED
Group Chat FuneralVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
Incantation
Santos, Santos, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Caleb Williams
- Colston Loveland
- Luther Burden III
- D'Andre Swift
- Kyle Monangai
- Rome Odunze
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
FAQ
How do I curse Cairo Santos in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Cairo Santos is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Cairo Santos actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.