The Doink Hex of Cairo Santos
Cairo Santos · CHI · K
“Santos gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Santos's week
- At 35, Santos is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
- Santos gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
76%POTENCY
-10.7PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Santos's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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FAQ
How do I curse Cairo Santos in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Cairo Santos is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Cairo Santos actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.