The Red-Zone Ghost Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“Parkinson is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson is already "Questionable" with that ribs. The witch only has to push gently.
- Parkinson gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
74%POTENCY
-16PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Parkinson, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Puka Nacua
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.