The Chip-and-Release Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“Parkinson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Stanford's biggest rival.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
- Parkinson tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.
72%POTENCY
-12.3PTS DRAINED
Eye-Roll MaterialVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- A used challenge flag
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Parkinson, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.