The Sunday Night Fade Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“Parkinson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Stanford's biggest rival.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- Parkinson sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
90%POTENCY
-11.8PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Powdered kicker confidence
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Parkinson, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.