The Late Scratch Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“Ref: "Number Parkinson, that's a flag." Parkinson: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- Parkinson catches 2 balls for 11 yards and a nice hug from a referee.
86%POTENCY
-15.1PTS DRAINED
Delete the AppVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- Powdered kicker confidence
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Parkinson's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.