The Mystery Tweak Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“Parkinson tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- Parkinson lines up as a tackle on 61% of snaps. A beautiful new career for him.
85%POTENCY
-13.1PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- Powdered kicker confidence
- A single tear from a Bengals fan
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Parkinson drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.