The Late Scratch Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“Parkinson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Stanford's biggest rival.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
- A localized thunderstorm forms over Parkinson's stadium. Only over Parkinson.
88%POTENCY
-10.7PTS DRAINED
Delete the AppVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Parkinson's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.