The Invisible Route Hex of Colston Loveland
Colston Loveland · CHI · TE
“Loveland goes down with a "tweak" in a game that was already won. Never even needed him.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Loveland's week
- Loveland gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Michigan's biggest rival.
- Loveland is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
76%POTENCY
-18.9PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single tear from a Patriots fan
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Loveland drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
FAQ
How do I curse Colston Loveland in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colston Loveland is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colston Loveland actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.