The Invisible Route Hex of Colston Loveland
Colston Loveland · CHI · TE
“Loveland gets a 40-yard pass, then immediately "adjusts his gloves" and is injured. Tragic.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Loveland's week
- Loveland will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- Loveland is targeted on a 3rd-and-17 and gains exactly 16 yards. Punt. Cry.
88%POTENCY
-19.2PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Falcons locker room
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Loveland drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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FAQ
How do I curse Colston Loveland in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colston Loveland is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colston Loveland actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.