The Chip-and-Release Hex of Colston Loveland
Colston Loveland · CHI · TE
“Loveland will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Loveland's week
- Loveland gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Michigan's biggest rival.
- Loveland is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
77%POTENCY
-18.3PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single Dolphins jersey, ironically worn
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Loveland's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Caleb Williams
- Luther Burden III
- D'Andre Swift
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Kyle Monangai
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Rome Odunze
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
FAQ
How do I curse Colston Loveland in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colston Loveland is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colston Loveland actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.