The Garbage-Time Hex of Detroit Lions
Detroit Lions defense
“The Lions defense allows a 99-yard drive, a 71-yard punt return, and a trick play from the 1989 playbook.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Detroit Lions defense's week
- The Lions will give up a touchdown to a tight end who was a high school wrestler. Net -2 points.
- The Lions defense scores a tackle-for-loss. In the other team's highlight reel.
73%POTENCY
-12.5PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A used challenge flag
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Lions's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
- Sam LaPorta
- Jared Goff
- Jake Bates
- Isaac TeSlaa
- DeAndre Carter
- Miles Kitselman
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
FAQ
How do I curse Detroit Lions defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Detroit Lions defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Detroit Lions defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.