The Shank Hex of Eddy Pineiro
Eddy Pineiro · SF · K
“Pineiro warms up well and then the snap is bad. The hold is worse. The kick is a prayer.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Pineiro's week
- Pineiro gets 2 attempts, both blocked by someone who is not even tall.
- Pineiro attempts a field goal, the holder pulls it back, and gets sacked at the 12. Points: 0. Dignity: also 0.
72%POTENCY
-9.7PTS DRAINED
Eye-Roll MaterialVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single Ravens jersey, ironically worn
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Pineiro drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Christian McCaffrey
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FAQ
How do I curse Eddy Pineiro in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Eddy Pineiro is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Eddy Pineiro actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.