The Late Scratch Hex of Evan McPherson
Evan McPherson · CIN · K
“McPherson will be perfect on extra points and absolutely nothing else.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins McPherson's week
- McPherson kicks a perfect ball into the end zone... and it is a kickoff. For the other team.
- The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. McPherson is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.
83%POTENCY
-12.9PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
Eye of Bengals, tongue of ref,
Bring Bengals down to grief,
McPherson scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Chase Brown
- Joe Burrow
- Tee Higgins
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Evan McPherson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Evan McPherson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Evan McPherson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.