The Doink Hex of Evan McPherson
Evan McPherson · CIN · K
“McPherson's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins McPherson's week
- McPherson sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
- A mysterious flag erases McPherson's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
82%POTENCY
-18.5PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Powdered kicker confidence
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
Incantation
McPherson, McPherson, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Chase Brown
- Joe Burrow
- Tee Higgins
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Evan McPherson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Evan McPherson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Evan McPherson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.