The Sunday Night Fade Hex of Indianapolis Colts
Indianapolis Colts defense
“The Colts defense allows a 99-yard drive, a 71-yard punt return, and a trick play from the 1989 playbook.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Indianapolis Colts defense's week
- The Colts defense generates 0 sacks, 0 turnovers and a lot of vibes.
- The Colts defense is "bend, don't break" and then breaks every single time.
80%POTENCY
-13.8PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Texans locker room
- Powdered kicker confidence
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Colts drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jonathan Taylor
- Tyler Warren
- Daniel Jones
- Spencer Shrader
- Seth McGowan
- Pharaoh Brown
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
- Arizona Cardinals
- Seattle Seahawks
FAQ
How do I curse Indianapolis Colts defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Indianapolis Colts defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Indianapolis Colts defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.