The Garbage-Time Hex of Indianapolis Colts
Indianapolis Colts defense
“The Colts defense scores a tackle-for-loss. In the other team's highlight reel.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Indianapolis Colts defense's week
- The Colts defense gets a pick-six called back for a penalty on... the defense. In the end zone.
- The Colts defense is "disguising coverages". The disguise is a clown nose. Fully see-through.
81%POTENCY
-16.4PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A single tear from a Chargers fan
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Colts drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jonathan Taylor
- Tyler Warren
- Daniel Jones
- Spencer Shrader
- Seth McGowan
- Pharaoh Brown
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
- Arizona Cardinals
- Seattle Seahawks
FAQ
How do I curse Indianapolis Colts defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Indianapolis Colts defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Indianapolis Colts defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.