The Late Scratch Hex of Indianapolis Colts
Indianapolis Colts defense
“The Colts defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Indianapolis Colts defense's week
- The Colts defense lets a 4th-and-17 conversion happen. Then another. Then a trick play.
- The Colts defense is "disguising coverages". The disguise is a clown nose. Fully see-through.
72%POTENCY
-17.3PTS DRAINED
Eye-Roll MaterialVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
Incantation
Colts, Colts, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jonathan Taylor
- Tyler Warren
- Daniel Jones
- Spencer Shrader
- Seth McGowan
- Pharaoh Brown
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
- Arizona Cardinals
- Seattle Seahawks
FAQ
How do I curse Indianapolis Colts defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Indianapolis Colts defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Indianapolis Colts defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.