The Shank Hex of Jake Elliott
Jake Elliott · PHI · K
“Elliott sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins Elliott's week
- Elliott hits the upright twice, then the other upright, then somehow the crossbar from the side.
- Elliott finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
83%POTENCY
-19.4PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
Incantation
Elliott, Elliott, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- DeVonta Smith
- Brandon Aubrey
- Makai Lemon
- Dallas Goedert
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Eli Stowers
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Elliott in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Elliott is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Elliott actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.