The Garbage-Time Hex of Jonathan Taylor
Jonathan Taylor · IND · RB
“Taylor tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Taylor's week
- Taylor's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.
- Taylor will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.
72%POTENCY
-9.1PTS DRAINED
Eye-Roll MaterialVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Taylor drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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FAQ
How do I curse Jonathan Taylor in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jonathan Taylor is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jonathan Taylor actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.