The Kneel-Down Hex of Kirk Cousins
Kirk Cousins · MIN · QB
“Cousins gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Michigan State's biggest rival.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Cousins's week
- At 38, Cousins is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
- Cousins scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.
90%POTENCY
-14.5PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
Incantation
Eye of Saints, tongue of ref,
Bring Vikings down to grief,
Cousins scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Justin Jefferson
- Joe Burrow
- Jayden Daniels
- Caleb Williams
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Kirk Cousins in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kirk Cousins is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kirk Cousins actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.