The Hamstring Hex of Kirk Cousins
Kirk Cousins · MIN · QB
“At 38, Cousins is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Cousins's week
- Cousins gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
- Cousins sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
82%POTENCY
-19.8PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A single Titans jersey, ironically worn
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Cousins's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Justin Jefferson
- Joe Burrow
- Jayden Daniels
- Caleb Williams
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Kirk Cousins in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kirk Cousins is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kirk Cousins actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.