The Checkdown Hex of Kirk Cousins
Kirk Cousins · MIN · QB
“At 38, Cousins is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Cousins's week
- Garbage time arrives early for Cousins: 29 points of garbage, scored by the other team.
- Cousins's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.
79%POTENCY
-14.3PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
Incantation
Eye of Bills, tongue of ref,
Bring Vikings down to grief,
Cousins scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Justin Jefferson
- Joe Burrow
- Jayden Daniels
- Caleb Williams
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Kirk Cousins in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kirk Cousins is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kirk Cousins actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.