The Pick-Six Hex of Kirk Cousins
Kirk Cousins · MIN · QB
“At 38, Cousins is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Cousins's week
- Cousins slides before the first-down marker, a moral victory for his health and nobody else.
- Every deep ball Cousins throws lands exactly one inch out of bounds.
75%POTENCY
-9.4PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- Powdered kicker confidence
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Cousins's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Justin Jefferson
- Joe Burrow
- Caleb Williams
- Jayden Daniels
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Kirk Cousins in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kirk Cousins is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kirk Cousins actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.