The Inch-Short Hex of Malik Nabers
Malik Nabers · NYG · WR
“The broadcast shows Nabers on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Nabers's week
- Nabers is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- The QB looks at Nabers exactly once: a 3-yard out on 3rd-and-9.
92%POTENCY
-12.6PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Nabers drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Chris Olave
- Rashee Rice
- DeVonta Smith
FAQ
How do I curse Malik Nabers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Malik Nabers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Malik Nabers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.