The Chip-and-Release Hex of Michael Mayer
Michael Mayer · LV · TE
“A mysterious flag erases Mayer's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins Mayer's week
- Mayer finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- The broadcast shows Mayer on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.
83%POTENCY
-13.4PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Jets locker room
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Mayer's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ashton Jeanty
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
- Oronde Gadsden
FAQ
How do I curse Michael Mayer in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Michael Mayer is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Michael Mayer actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.