The Garbage-Time Hex of New England Patriots
New England Patriots defense
“The Patriots will give up a touchdown to a tight end who was a high school wrestler. Net -2 points.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins New England Patriots defense's week
- The Patriots defense scores a tackle-for-loss. In the other team's highlight reel.
- The Patriots defense lets a 4th-and-17 conversion happen. Then another. Then a trick play.
81%POTENCY
-13PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Patriots's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Drake Maye
- A.J. Brown
- TreVeyon Henderson
- Rhamondre Stevenson
- Hunter Henry
- Andy Borregales
- Kyle Williams
- Cameron Latu
- Eli Raridon
- Houston Texans
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
FAQ
How do I curse New England Patriots defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If New England Patriots defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing New England Patriots defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.