The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of New England Patriots
New England Patriots defense
“The Patriots defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins New England Patriots defense's week
- The Patriots defense is gashed by a QB who has not thrown a TD all year. His mom is in the stands.
- The Patriots defense generates 0 sacks, 0 turnovers and a lot of vibes.
73%POTENCY
-18.1PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Patriots's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Drake Maye
- A.J. Brown
- TreVeyon Henderson
- Rhamondre Stevenson
- Hunter Henry
- Andy Borregales
- Kyle Williams
- Cameron Latu
- Eli Raridon
- Houston Texans
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
FAQ
How do I curse New England Patriots defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If New England Patriots defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing New England Patriots defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.